Until coming to college, I never realized how lacking (for a lack of better terms) my relationship with the Lord was. I always attempted to make quiet time with Him but seemed to fail over and over again. (and still do) In high school I had tried to participate in as many Christian activities as possible because this was a lifestyle I wanted to live and be known by. Having met so many passionate Christians from the very day I moved in at UNC, God has used many of his passionate sons and daughters to show me what it means to have an even more intimate and personal relationship with Him than I could have ever imagined!
Throughout first semester, God began to show me the areas of my life that needed some heavy duty renovation! Most importantly, I knew I needed to spend more time with Him to build that intimacy with Him I was so desperately longing for and needing. I was so frustrated that I wasn't passionate about spending as much time possible with The One who loves me more than anyone and gave His own life for me. While I continued to desire a more personal relationship with my Creator, I continued to live in this "rut..." I neglected my quiet time and prayer life and many Sundays I chose to do homework instead of going to church.I don't know why but I was so afraid to try somewhere new when I had gone to the same church my entire life.
Second semester was a turning point...
God has been so gracious in many many ways. I had decided over Christmas break that once the semester started I really wanted to try a church I had visited once called The Summit. One of my good friends was already going there and she was so gracious to give me a ride every Sunday. Ever since the first Sunday I attended God has continued to use each message to draw me closer to Him. In each sermon He has shown me how much I fall short but how gracious, loving, protective, merciful, and forgiving He is. For the first time in my life I have been struck by the reality that when I sing songs about the sinner, the beggar, and the lost, I am all these things a part from Christ!
It didn't just stop there...
When my Bible Study leaders asked if any of us were interested in being discipled at the beginning of the semester, I knew this was something that would be healthy as I desired to learn more about the Lord. Because I love and look up to each leader in the same way, I was so nervous to have to "pick" who I wanted to be discipled by. No need to be nervous because God had already "picked" one of the leaders for me when we both approached each other about starting this relationship. I have been so blessed by this relationship. I can always be completely honest with her about how my day is going, how my quiet time is going, and what I need prayer for. While she is only two years older than me, she has that sweet and intimate relationship with the Lord that I want so badly. Through reading a book together called, Crazy Love by Francis Chann (buy it right now if you've never read it!) I have caught glimpses of what it looks like to live a fully surrendered life to Christ. It scares me to think of living a half-hearted life for Christ because I know that's not living for Christ at all. She also encouraged me to read Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot. I can't even begin to tell you how much God has used this book to change my heart about things. (I highly recommend it for both girls and guys!)
I don't even like to read and I can't put either one of these books down!
These are just two ways God has drawn me closer to Him. No, I do not spend near as much time with Him as I should but He has given me a strong desire to live all my life for Him and not just parts of it. It's so beautiful that He has all the answers to these questions and will make them known when I seek Him...Ahhh,There are so many specific things He has shown me that I definitely want to share with y'all in some posts to follow. Bottom line, I will never be able to fathom how great our God is but I can taste it and see it and I want to experience it more and more each day!
I LOVE Passion and Purity.
ReplyDeletechanged my life.